Just Thinking…About the Lord

I find comfort and assurance in knowing that the Lord never wrings His hands in worry.  Nothing takes Him by surprise.  God never has an anxious thought.  He doesn’t toss and turn all night or need an extra cup of coffee to get through the day.  He’s never weary.  God never wonders “what if”. 

At the End of the Day...A Good Indicator

A good indicator that I’m trying to get through each day on my own strength, power, wisdom and might is when I arrive home completely spent.  It’s an exhaustion that a good night’s sleep won’t remedy.  In fact sleep often evades me because my mind is constantly on the go.   I feel like I can’t turn it off. 

Along with other changes in recent months, I am not able to listen to my IPod and partake of good solid Christian teaching as much as I used to.  I desperately miss that.  It fed my heart, mind and soul.  Somehow I need to build that back into my daily life. 

I think I’ve let the busyness and demands of life…work, home and responsibilities crowd God out…or assign Him to a small place that I will get to when I have the time.  Ouch!  Not good…not good at all.

Like any relationship…my relationship with God grows when I spend time with Him and listen to Him and share what’s going on with me.  Trust Him with what I’m going through.  Trust His counsel and be quick to obey. 

It’s the time spent in prayer…or opening the Bible and reading with my ear inclined towards God. 

You know that feeling when you are in love…and you hang on every word that comes out of your loved one’s mouth.  You can’t wait to hear what they will say next.  You treasure and value their advice because their wisdom is combined with love for you. 

I feel like that’s what I’m missing with God.  And I want it back…starting tonight.  I want to hold on to Jesus and not let go. 

1/13/07 At the End of the Day…Rooted and Grounded

During the school year...on most Saturday nights you will find me working on my Bible Study Fellowship lesson. Tonight is no different. This year is my most favorite because we are studying the book of Romans. If one can say that they have a favorite book of the Bible…I would say Romans is my favorite…and this week’s chapter, chapter 8 is my favorite. But to narrow it down ever further…we studied vs. 28-39.

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:

‘For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.’

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” – Romans 8:28-39

I do believe that out of the entire Bible…if I could fully lay hold of these verses, comprehend them and live by them…they would transform my life. I’d say that this last year has taught me more about the truth of these verses in a more personal way…than ever before. As I reflect back…I now know God in a more personal way…as He stood with me and walked with me through every trepid and lonely step.

I must confess that many a time during this process…I did not feel His presence or His ever present help in times of trouble. But looking back at the wake my ship that sailed…I can see God’s presence and help along the way.

At times…the seas I sailed on were stormy and tumultuous and at other times peaceful and smooth as glass. There were many days…that felt like torpedoes…one after another were coming my way. Little did I know it but my lifeboat was at hand. Many a time…I was resting comfortably and safely in it as the storm assailed my tiny boat. But the Master was at the helm.

At times…my ship sailed ever so close to treacherous shoreline…when the storm threatened to dash my ship upon the rocks. However…oh Captain, my Captain with ease brought me safe into a calm harbor.

I found two questions in this week’s lesson most compelling. 1) We were to read through chapter 8 of Romans and tell which two statements we most wanted to remember and why? 2) What difficulty has Christ’s love helped us to conquer this year?

Reviewing chapter 8 and writing my responses…was both moving and difficult in the fact that it brought back painful times in my very recent past.

To the first question…there were two scripture verses that stood out to me the most.

“If God is for us, who can be against us?” Romans 8:31b

The obvious answer is that if God is for us…it is insignificant and it pales in comparison who stand against us…because God and His love is so powerful. In essence their opposition amounts to nothing. As much as some stood against me…more so, there were those people who did not stand with me. Even in that…I had the one Person…the One who matters most that stood and remains standing in my corner. He never left me, nor forsook me.

“I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.” – Romans 8:18

It surprised me that this scripture verse meant a lot to me when reading chapter 8 this year. Normally vs. 8:28 is my favorite. In fact I consider it my life verse:

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

But right now…verse 18 means a lot to me. To know that even though my present burdens seem very heavy that one day…I will look back and see that they were very light indeed. That God will repay me more than I can ever imagine or deserve for the troubles I’ve endured.

To the second question…what has Christ’s love helped me to conquer this year? Well…I guess all of the above is what He helped me to conquer. That which a year ago…I could never have imagined and I am most grateful to have not known beforehand was coming my way.

In some respects…it kind of scares me…because I know today is preparation for tomorrow. These recent difficulties were meant to help me grow stronger and prepare me for tomorrow.

That is why it is essential that I be rooted and grounded in the Word of God and be ever mindful of His work and presence in my life.

If any of you are in need of a good, strong, foundational Bible study…I would highly recommend Bible Study Fellowship. You will grow in wisdom and knowledge through God’s Word…and you will know God in a more personal way through the study of His word.

“But without faith it is impossible to please and be satisfactory to Him. For whoever would come near to God must [necessarily] believe that God exists and that He is the rewarder of those who earnestly and diligently seek Him [out].” – Hebrews 11:6 Amplified Bible

1/6/07 At the End of the Day…Most Blessed

One of the things I treasure most in this world is my church, Kindred Community Church.

Even when we were still a Bible Study… I knew I beheld a treasure and was most grateful to God for bring me to this wonderful place. A place where the Word of God is taught uncompromisingly in a powerful way. God soon grew our Bible study into a Church. One that set out to “Reach the World with the Word”.

I was ever so excited as we ventured out as a church. I remember well our first Sunday in the Elks Club in Santa Ana. After that first Sunday…we had to move to the largest room they had available.

It was through the illness and death of my beloved Pastor Chuck Obremski…that God knit our congregation together with a thread of love. A weave which remains tightly held together with love…but with a loose enough weave that we welcome into our fold those who come to Kindred.

Tonight I heard a story that warmed my heart. Doreen Apple has had the opportunity to share with a family that has become near and dear to her heart. On Christmas Eve, many of the family members came to our Christmas Eve service. God has used Doreen to share His Word with this dear family.

Recently one of the youngest members Joseph was inquiring how Kindred got its name. Doreen explained to Joseph our church’s history. Precious Joseph commented that he wished that he had been there when we first started as a church and he would have named it, “The Church that Loves Jesus”.

When Doreen asked why…he said because everyone he’s met there is in love with Jesus. And indeed we are.

If you live in the Southern California area…I would invite you to come to our Sunday morning church service…which starts at 9 AM. If you would like to hear any of Pastor Chuck’s great preaching of God’s Word…go to Kindred’s website and click on the Audio Ministry page.

Tonight and always…I am most grateful for bringing me to a saving faith in His Son Jesus Christ. I am thankful…that He allowed me to find Kindred…where I am fed the Word of God in the most loving church I know. I am most blessed by God.

1/5/07 At the End of the Day…Tired

On average…I’ve been getting about four to five hours sleep a night for quite a long time now. On occasion…I’ll sleep a full night’s sleep of seven or eight hours.

But this lack of sleep is really catching up with me. I’m exhausted all the time. My head feels fuzzy and I find it hard to think clearly.

I feel like there are just not enough hours in the day. Rather than go to bed a wee bit earlier…I’ll more often than not supplement with caffeine. I often joke around saying, “Good thing coffee is legal…otherwise I’d be sneaking around trying to by dime bags of Folgers on the street corner.”

It’s an exaggeration…but not by much. Ever once and a while…I’ll check my brain at the door and get the brilliant idea that I can snack on the chocolate covered espresso beans. Not a really good idea…for oodles of reasons.

But my Heavenly Father bids me to come unto Him and He will give me rest. So off to bed I go.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” – Matthew 11:28

Good night…and sweet dreams.

1/3/07 At the End of the Day…Repentance

This evening post could actually qualify for a new website I’m working on called Susan’s God Stops…in which I jot down when I recognize God’s presence in my life…and the message He may be conveying to me at that time.

Today was rich and filled with God Stops for me. Ones that ultimately challenged me, convicted me…and ultimately lead me to repentance. I have ever so hugely failed God in letting doubt and unbelief take hold of my emotions and thoughts with respect to all the changes in my life in the past year.

In so many respects…2006 was a year of great loss and disappointment…impacting my job, my mom, friends, family, physical pain and even my dear pets. It seems like so much of my life was touched.

In the crunch time…when push came to shove…all too often instead of trusting God when answers were not readily apparent…I fell into doubt and unbelief. I doubted that God really cared for me. I believed the lies of Satan.

When I reflect on different aspects of last year…I wonder how different things would have been if I had stood firm in my faith.

When I didn’t understand why I lost the job I loved and the actions of others…I could have trusted God, instead of doubting. Knowing that He had a purpose and plan. Take my hurt to God for His care and healing touch…rather than expect a person to make it all better. Be assured that none of this took Him by surprise. That He is calling me to something new. That He removed me and put a hedge of protection around me and He did not allow me to return for a reason. That I had allowed work to become too important to me. That instead I need to serve God with the same fervor that I served man.

Well today God gave me another insight into why He may have allowed these circumstances to transpire. Would He have revealed it sooner if I had trusted Him? Would I have not needed additional assurance if I had stood firm in my faith? This insight I think I’ll ponder in my heart rather than share it at this time.

Other areas of my life were touched this year as well…including my mom who suffers with Alzheimer’s was hospitalized twice. In the aloneness of that time when my brothers were absent as they have been for several years now…I was overwhelmed and felt resentful towards them. On a drive home one night after leaving the hospital…God mercifully revealed His hand of protection in their absence.

In so many of these circumstances…I would have far better weathered the storms that assailed me…if I had trusted God, His character, work, purpose and plan in my life. On occasion I got it right. For a while I did trust God and didn’t ask why. But when I failed to stand firm and trust God…boy oh boy did I fall.

So God…tonight…I humbly come before you and confess my sin of doubt and unbelief. I confess there are times that I didn’t trust you…or believe that you cared for me. I didn’t look closer to see Your hand in my circumstances…and know that there were bigger things going on.

I thank you that You are a God of second chances and can redeem even my failings and use them for Your Kingdom and glory. I thank You for Your hand of protection upon me and removing that which You determined necessary. I give over to You…a bundle feelings too numerous to mention…and too personal too share with the world. I thank You for giving me insight along the way as to why You allowed the circumstances I encountered. I thank You for the lessons I learned, what it revealed in others and me.

So God…what is it that You would have me to do now? Give me ears to hear I pray. Jesus…thank You for walking each step with me…and carrying me when I fell. PS…Jesus…please stay close by me…I’m quite certain I will fall and once again…and turn to Your precious hand to lift me up.

1/2/07 At the End of the Day…Accepted

At the end of the day…I am grateful to know that even if all men leave me or reject me, my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ will never leave me nor forsake.

Even if I’ve become a pariah in their eyes…that I am accepted in the Beloved.

I’m grateful to know that even though my feelings are like waves in the ocean…Jesus Christ is my steady Rock.

I’m grateful to know that my feelings are not the final arbiter…but instead Truth is found in God’s Holy Word the Bible.

May I be ever mindful that the Truth shall set me free!

Dear Jesus…I look forward to how you will answer and fulfill the scripture verse that you have given me for 2007. I look forward to Your amazing work in my life. I pray that You will remove my reproach and shame.